Jul 5th, 2006
Back In Control
Okay, so I faced it, I have gained six pounds. This is not the end of the world. I mean, it seemed like it a few days ago, but since then I have gotten back on track and feel like it will only be a short time before I shed those measly pounds. I worked out both Monday and Tuesday and actually lifted on my own. It has been ages since I’ve done that, but I really pushed myself and have the resulting soreness today to prove it.
I’ve also been taking care to eat a lot better too. It was 4th of July weekend, so I didn’t create any ridiculous and overzealous rules for myself. I was realistic and set eating goals I could achieve and feel good about, because god knows, I was on a slippery slope and setting myself up for failure would have been disastrous. Now I feel much more in control of things and that I’ve gotten myself back on track.
It really is funny, though, what a difference a couple of work outs makes. I know that working out two days in a row and eating better isn’t going to magically take off the recent weight I’ve gained, but it has put my head in the place it needs to be. I mean, I was walking around the city the other day in this cute dress, but all I could think off was how awful I felt and how upset I was that I had let myself slide back. I can honestly say that I felt horrible about myself and was mentally getting to a place where I hadn’t been in months and a place I never wanted to be again. So really, it isn’t the six pounds, tighter pants or an extra roll on my tummy that is motivating me. It is the fact that I really just get so unhappy when I’m not in control of my weight. I lose all confidence, I don’t want to talk to anyone, I don’t even want anyone to see me. It truly is miserable. I’m just too young to waste so much time being unhappy about something I can actually control. So anyway, that is my motivation and anytime I don’t feel like going to the gym or eating a second helping of anything I need to remember I’m making a choice- and I choose to be happy.
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